It looks as if the sexual market crisis is finally entering into mainstream conversation. From a recently published New Yorker article:
These days, in this country, sex has become a hyper-efficient and deregulated marketplace, and, like any hyper-efficient and deregulated marketplace, it often makes people feel very bad. Our newest sex technologies, such as Tinder and Grindr, are built to carefully match people by looks above all else. Sexual value continues to accrue to abled over disabled, cis over trans, thin over fat, tall over short, white over nonwhite, rich over poor.
Since the church tends to follow suit with the mainstream media, I suspect this will be topic of open conversation soon among Christians. But since Churchians tend to adapt secular conclusions rather than thinking biblically, I expect we’ll see a re-working of the same conclusion [emphasis mine]:
It is men, not women, who have shaped the contours of the incel predicament. It is male power, not female power, that has chained all of human society to the idea that women are decorative sexual objects, and that male worth is measured by how good-looking a woman they acquire. Women—and, specifically, feminists—are the architects of the body-positivity movement, the ones who have pushed for an expansive redefinition of what we consider attractive. “Feminism, far from being Rodger’s enemy,” Srinivasan wrote, “may well be the primary force resisting the very system that made him feel—as a short, clumsy, effeminate, interracial boy—inadequate.” Women, and L.G.B.T.Q. people, are the activists trying to make sex work legal and safe, to establish alternative arrangements of power and exchange in the sexual market.
We can’t redistribute women’s bodies as if they are a natural resource; they are the bodies we live in. We can redistribute the value we apportion to one another—something that the incels demand from others but refuse to do themselves. I still think about Bette telling me, in 2013, how being lonely can make your brain feel like it’s under attack. Over the past week, I have read the incel boards looking for, and occasionally finding, proof of humanity, amid detailed fantasies of rape and murder and musings about what it would be like to assault one’s sister out of desperation. In spite of everything, women are still more willing to look for humanity in the incels than they are in us.
“Men, women are not sex objects. The gospel has set her free from such oppression. I could tell you horror stories of husbands who emotionally abuse their wives by dictating what she should eat, telling her what to wear, and shaming her for her body. The Bible tells us that the Lord judges by the contents of the heart, not outward appearances. Some of you men are still basing your worth on how your wife looks. But Christ Jesus has freed you from such superficial standards.
“And some of you young men are complaining that you can’t find a wife. But what are you doing to prepare to marry one of God’s daughters? We have plenty of fine young ladies right here in this congregation waiting for a godly man to win her hand in marriage. But many of you men won’t man up and marry the girl because your standards are too high. Listen guys, we are all flawed sinners. She’s not expecting perfection in you, neither should you expect perfection in her. I think we guys could learn something from the compassion of women.”
Of course, the young men won’t want to marry any of the “fine young ladies” because they will be objectively unattractive. And since the church will eradicate any hint of alpha qualities out of their men, expect the small number of attractive women to marry outside the church as they go about “witnessing.”
And since unattractiveness generally correlates with poor health, expect to see those prayer lists growing in proportion to the sizes of the women’s waists.
We should always show mercy, regardless of one’s life choices. But I wouldn’t be surprised if, in the coming decades, being a hero for the truth will come down to something as historically obvious as refusing to marry and reproduce with unattractive sickly women.