It’s an accepted truth in the manosphere that there is a trifecta of personality traits that result in immense personal power.
This “dark triad” gives a man access to high social status, power over men, and is the key to unlocking the legs of women. Basically, a Dark Triad man can get whatever he wants.
In case you’re not familiar with the traits, here’s a quick summary:
Narcissism – self-love and ridiculously high self-confidence. Low-self esteem people live their lives vicariously through high-self esteem people.
Machiavellianism – seeing life as a game of strategy that must be manuevered. People are seen as objects to be manipulated and used for their utilitarian value. Women love this (subconciously) because they have a craving to be the object of a man’s lust. And men without purpose want to feel useful and thus respond to a Machiavellian man.
Psychopathy – no sense of guilt or discomfort with making immoral choices. Psychopathic people do not feel guilt or fear about making ruthless decisions. This is advantageous to their quest for power, whereas more conscientious people have great difficulty doing anything manipulative.
(You can read a more in-depth summary at the Illimitable Men blog.)
At first glance, it would appear that Christian men are at a disadvantage. None of those attributes sound like appropriate behavior for a follower of Christ.
But it recently occurred to me that there is an equivalent to the Dark Triad for Christian men. Not only equivalant, but, I would content, superior to the Dark Triad.
The Kingdom Man’s “Dark Triad” consists of three attributes:
- Fear of the Lord
I will address each in turn below…
Trait #1: Diligence
The plans of the diligent lead surely to advantage, But everyone who is hasty comes surely to poverty. (Proverbs 21:5)
Diligence, when properly understood, has the same effect of irrational ego-based confidence.
Many Christians mistakenly believe that diligence is synonymous with hard work. While people often avoid diligence due to laziness, hard work is typically the result of a lack of diligence.
If you look up charuwts (diligence) in a Hebrew lexicon, you’ll see that it does not mean “hard work” or “effort.” It means “decision” with the image of making a deep and permanent cut. In other words, it’s a decision made after a careful analysis of the situation. It also involves taking self-initiated action on that decision (Prov 6:7-8).
The Bible teaches that being hurried is the opposite of diligence. Or, as Tim Ferriss puts it:
“Being busy is a form of laziness – lazy thinking and indiscriminate action.”
Probably the closest modern concept we have to diligence is the 80/20 principle. Approximately 20% of your inputs generate 80% of the output. 20% of your actions will result in 80% of your success. 20% of your habits are generating 80% of your problems. etc. etc.
The key is, don’t focus on working harder. Only two types of people believe working harder is the best solution: people who are insecure and people who are stupid.
Focus on making better decisions and then do those few things that will get you the best results.
Or focus on enduring the trials that will force the majority of your competition to drop out.
My wife sometimes accuses me of being arrogant. But I have a sincere belief that I am (or can be) better than the vast majority of men in whatever I choose to focus on.
But my confidence doesn’t come from a sense of being special. I simply understand that, at every level of competition, 80% of men are losers (relatively speaking.)
For example, if you accept the red pill and decide you want to have sex with a real woman rather than settle for porn and masturbation, that puts you in the top 20% of men.
If you actually manage to establish the (few essential) daily habits that will help you reach your red pill goals, that puts you in the top 4% of men.
If you study and practice advanced seduction techniques, that puts you in the top 1% of men.
And so on and so forth.
At every level of competition, you can count on these truths:
- 80% of your competitors will be too lazy (i.e. busy) to make a better decision
- 80% of your competitors will give up at the next roadblock
- 80% of your roadblocks are coming from 20% of the inputs
Once you truly grasp the power of diligence and the 80/20 Principle, you’ll have the same level of confidence of a narcissist.
Trait #2: Shrewdness
And his master praised the unrighteous manager because he had acted shrewdly; for the sons of this age are more shrewd in relation to their own kind than the sons of light. (Luke 16:8)
Christians are notoriously dim-witted when it comes to dealing with worldly affairs. This was the case even during Christ’s ministry.
A prime example of Christian naivity was during the advent of the movie as a new entertainment medium. Rather than seizing the opportunity and sending bright young men to film school, ministers wasted their efforts derailing against the evils of the medium and warning people to stay away. So instead, we’ve opted to allow God-hating secularists to seize the medium and use it to indoctrinate our children with feminism, socialism, and all kinds of other hellish ideologies.
And we still haven’t learned. Even to this day, pastors still haven’t figured out that what people read/watch/listen to on their phones informs their worldview more than what they hear from the pulpit. Preachers are boring. Social media is exciting. Attention is influence.
But it’s not just about seizing new communication mediums. It’s about building the kingdom and letting your light shine with the same level of shrewdness as one who is pursuing ungodly power.
Do you want to be great in the kingdom of God? Jesus says to build your house on the rock and shine your light for the world to see (Matthew 5:14-16.)
It’s always a battle. Either the world will overcome and subsume your house. Or your house will shine a light so bright that the world will be drawn to it.
It’s a shameful thing for a man to lose his dynasty. If a man is not vigilant, worldly people who are more shrewd than him will snatch away his children and spoil his work.
I recommend starting by reading and frequently pondering Robert Greene’s 48 Laws of Power. Apply that level of thinking towards leading your wife and building your house to be a beacon of light in the world.
Trait #3: Fear of the Lord
Do not fear those who kill the body but are unable to kill the soul; but rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell. (Matthew 10:28)
A man who fears rejection from God is immune to the social pressures of his day.
Imagine yourself standing before God’s throne on the judgment day…
“But… but… but God. I was following the traditional faith. I believed everything the catechism said. Everyone else was going that way. Surely, you’d understand…”
“Liar. You have twisted my plain words and willingly followed false teachers. This man is a worthless coward. Take him away and burn him. He is unfit for the kingdom.”
Remember that God is a fair judge. He doesn’t judge on a curve. You either bear good fruit or you don’t. And God says there is no room for cowards in the kingdom of Heaven. (Revelation 21:8)
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to test the limits of how much cowardice God’s mercy overlooks on the final judgment.
Don’t put your trust in religious slogans like “grace alone” or “my intentions are good.” Rather, you should be scared shitless about violating or adding to what God has plainly communicated in His word.
If you don’t understand a passage, beg God for wisdom and read the passage (in context) over and over until it makes sense.
When you find something in the Scripture that is contrary to what you believe or do, immediately change your mind about the matter.
And above all, show mercy to others so that God will be merciful to you (James 2:13)
Don’t rely on pastors.
Don’t rely on theologians.
Don’t rely on tradition.
You have the Holy Spirit who teaches you all things. (John 14:26)
When you truly understand the fear of the Lord, you will have no qualms about blatantly denying the unbiblical B.S. that passes off as church tradition. You won’t allow your conscience to be bound to extra-biblical teachings.
In other words, you will have the power of a psychopath.
Keep in mind that the majority of men have none of these traits. So if you can tap into the synergy of having all three traits, you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. Your house will be immune to storms and your light will shine forth before the world. And you will be called great in the kingdom of Heaven.
These are the kind of men that are needed to build a kingdom.