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Sexual Market Value Test for Married Men

(Adapted from Chateau Heartiste’s “Dating Market Value Test for Men“)

The #1 fear of most married men today is “What if my wife leaves me?”

This fear prevents men from “getting their balls back.” It’s better to leave with a contentious woman in a low sex marriage, than be alone, goes the reasoning.

This is why it’s critical to improve your sexual market value. Not because you should go mess around with other women. But because you need to know you could get another woman if your current wife ever left you.

This test will help you assess your attractiveness to women in general. And since your wife is a woman, it will probably make you more attractive to her as well.

(NOTE: Expect your score to be low the first time you take this. Take it twice. Once for your present score and once for your potential score after improving the things you know you can do with some work.)

1. How old are you?

under 25 years old:  0 points
26-34 years old:  +1 point
35-45 years old:  0 points
45+ years old:  -1 point


2. How tall are you?

under 5’9″:  -1 point
5’9″ to 5’11”:  0 points
6′ to 6’4″:  +1 point
over 6’4″:  0 points


3. What is your BMI?

(Go here to calculate.)

under 20.0:  -1 point
20.0 to 24.0:  +1 point
24.1 to 27.0:  0 points
over 27.0:  -1 point


4. How much do you bench press?

60% or less of your body weight:  -1 point
61% to 80% of your body weight:  0 points
81% to 170% of your body weight:  +1 point
over 170% of your body weight:  0 points


5. What does your hairline look like?

Full head of hair (over 35yo):  +1 point
Full head of hair (under 35yo):  0 points
Receding hairline (over 35yo):  0 points
Receding hairline (under 35yo):  -1 point
Bald (age irrelevant):  -1 point
Bald, but dark-skinned:  0 points


6. How much money do you make?

under $40K and out of college:  -1 point
$40K to $70K out of college and under 40 years old:  0 points
over $70K out of college and under 40 years old:  +1 point
under $40K and college age or younger:  0 points
$40K to $55K and over 40 years old:  -1 point
$55K to $90K and over 40 years old:  0 points
over $90K and over 40 years old:  +1 point
over $200K (age irrelevant):  +1 point


7. Do you have a car? (i.e. a car your wife did not bring into the marriage)

No (under 21yo):  0 points
No (over 21yo):  -1 point
Yes (under 21yo):  +1 point
Yes (over 21yo):  0 points
You have a motorcycle (age irrelevant):  +1 point


8. How good-looking are you?

My looks are a liability:  -1 point
I’m an average looking dude:  0 points
Women frequently compliment my appearance:  +1 point


9. Do you have a leadership role that is clearly visible to women? (e.g. sports team leader, boss, pastor, instructor, popular author, etc.)

No:  0 points
Yes:  +1 point


10. How “cool” is your occupation?

Books, movies and TV shows are often produced about my profession (e.g. doctor, lawyer, stockbroker, entrepreneur, successful artist, professional athlete, etc.):  +1 point

My profession is respectable and there is no shame when people ask what I do (e.g. engineer, programmer, accountant, mid-level manager, owner of a “boring” business, etc.):  0 points

People politely change the subject to avoid embarrassing me after I tell them what I do (e.g. low paid blue collar, janitor, food service, struggling freelancer, etc.):  -1 point


11. How many friends do you have? (A friend being a non-family member you’d be comfortable calling if you needed help with a problem)

0 to 3:  -1 point
4 to 20:  0 points
over 20:  +1 point


12. How many friends are left when you subtract the ones you met online but never seen in person?

2 or more:  0 points
Less than 2:  -1 point


13. When was the last time you had dinner with a non-family member of your age group? (video game parties don’t count)

Within the past month:  +1 point
Between one month and a year ago:  0 points
Over one year ago:  -1 point


14. How funny/witty are you?

No one outside my family thinks I’m funny:  -1 point

I can hold my own in a witty exchange, but I’m no comedian.  0 points

I have reputation for being funny/clever. Becoming a professional comedian or humorist is a plausible pursuit:  +1 point


15. How intelligent are you?

I am uneducated and often feel stupid. Life is very difficult.  -1 point

I only read when I have to for school or work. I read this blog because it’s about sex, but I wish it were videos instead.  0 points

I enjoy reading blogs and books and having intellectual discussions. People generally regard me as intelligent.  +1 point

People think I’m odd and I have difficulty communicating to people who can’t follow abstract reasoning or accept logical conclusions:  0 points

I am almost completely isolated in my own head. I have no idea how to relate to ordinary people.  -1 point


16. You’re at a social gathering. You’re standing in close proximity to someone you’ve never met. Who starts the conversation?

I start the conversation almost every time:  +1 point
I will occasionally start the conversation:  0 points
I feel awkward and wait for the other person to start the conversation:  -1 point


17.  Do you regularly engage in combat or an extreme thrill seeking activity (e.g. martial arts, active military in a war zone, rock climbing, skydiving, etc.)?

(Alternatively: do you play a dominant role in the bedroom and give your wife sexual experiences that most women can only fantasize about?)

Yes:  +1 point
No, but my interests are appropriately masculine:  0 points
I have difficulty relating to men:  -1 point


18. Does your background resemble anything like the theme of a prime time drama show (e.g. drug dealer, gang member, undercover cop, military commander, powerful political family, etc.)?

(Alternatively: Do you live a lifestyle that would make an interesting reality TV episode? A lifestyle others would be jealous of?)

Nope. Pretty normal background:  0 points

Yep:  +1 point

My background would make for an interesting news segment, but not to my benefit (e.g. child pornography, public exposure, pedophilia, etc.):  -1 point



The following questions are designed to test different aspects of your psychological dominance (i.e. “game”). Obviously there’s room for different styles, but pick the response that most closely represents how you would respond in the given scenario.


19. You make a move on your wife but she indicates she’s not in the mood or makes an excuse. How do you respond?

(A) “Oh, sorry.”
(B) “Alright Babe.” [Shrug and go do something else.]
(C) “Yes, but I know how to make my kitty purr. Now be a good girl and…”

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point


20. You’re occupied with one of your hobbies when your wife asks you to help her solve a non-urgent problem that she could probably handle herself. How do you respond?

(A) Stop what you’re doing and help her.
(B) Tell her you’ll take a look at it later.
(C) Tell her about a nifty little tool called Google

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point


21. You’re watching a movie and an erotic scene comes on involving a gorgeous woman. How do you respond?

(A) Sneak off to the bathroom at the soonest opportunity to jerk off
(B) Glance away or skip the scene then get on with the show
(C) Analyze the scene with the dispassionate interest of a scientist and file away possible experimentation ideas for later

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point


22. You’re making out with your wife and your pants are bulging with excitement. She’s obviously getting into it too. What’s your next move?

(A) Immediately grope her boob
(B) Continue to make out with her as long she wants
(C) Tease her and create erotic tension. Then make her beg for it.

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point


23. You have some new things you’d like to try with your wife in the bedroom. How do you bring it up?

(A) Try to drop some hints, then get frustrated when she doesn’t pick up on them.
(B) Sit down with her and directly tell her what you’d like to try
(C) Get inside of her head with covert persuasion and seduce her into wanting to do crazier things

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point


24. Which closest resembles your sexual strategy?

(A) I do lots favors for her and frequently tell her how beautiful she is in hopes that she’ll return the favor
(B) I establish an expectation that sex is an important and regular part of marriage
(C) I challenge her to work hard to please me. Sex is her reward for being a “good girl.”

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point


25. Your wife starts nagging you about a mistake you recently made. How do you respond?

(A) Try to defend myself
(B) Ignore her
(C) Shame her into silence for her disrespectful tone

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point


26. You’re hanging out with the family in the living room when you realize you need to grab something from the car. What do you tell your wife?

(A) “I have to get something from the car. I’ll be right back.”
(B) “Excuse me for a second.”
(C) Nothing. You just get up and go. If she asks where you’re going you make a cryptic remark that leaves her wondering what you’re up to.

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point


27. Your wife is preparing dinner and she is in a fun and flirtatious mood. There is clearly some sexual tension between the two of you. She bends over to get something out of the lower cupboard and you feel in groin that she needs a good playful smack on the ass to remind her who she belongs to. What do you do?

(A) Imagine doing it and then do nothing, telling yourself she wouldn’t be into that sort of thing.
(B) Do it and hint that you’re looking forward to “bed time.”
(C) Do it. Then tell her dinner can wait. Pin her to the wall and give her some passionate lovin’ right then and there (or haul her off to the bedroom if the kids are around.)

If you answered (A), -1 point
If (B), 0 points
If (C), +1 point




As with the original test, there are 26 possible points. Here’s the scoring breakdown:

-26: No comment.

-25 to -20: You’re an omega male. It’s a fluke of nature that you’re even married. Your wife is probably very… different. If she leaves you, you can take comfort in the fact that people such as Nikola Tesla, Lewis Carroll, and Isaac Newton made great contributions to society without being bogged down with the hassle of sex.

-19 to -15: You are repulsive to women. I doubt I can help you. At least not at this point.

-14 to -10: You have no right to complain about your wife being fat or unattractive. You have a lot of ground to cover just to get to a socially acceptable level of emasculation. But miracle transformations can happen.

-9 to 0: You are a lesser beta. Your wife probably sees you as her “man-servant.” It won’t be easy, but with much effort you can “get your balls back” and maybe even inspire her to have sex with you again.

1 to 9: You are a typical modern guy (i.e. classic beta male). You are probably far to “nice” to your wife. All that “dangerous” and “toxic” masculinity you hear about? Yeah, you don’t have that. Always assume that you’re being too much of a pussy. Up the ante and aggressively pursue what you want. Highlight your desirable features and learn game. There is hope!

10 to 14: You’re an upper beta. Unless alpha men would consider your wife hot, this is probably a sufficient level of masculinity for you to inspire your wife to have regular sex with you. If your current wife ever left you, you can get another attractive woman with some effort. So don’t let fear of loss hold you back. Up your game and let her know who’s in charge!

15 to 19: You are a lower alpha. For the self-motivated sexual man, this is a good zone to settle. The benefits of ascending higher are probably not worth the cost if sex alone is your primary motivation. There’s no need to fear guiding your wife with a strong hand. If she ever left you, you could easily get a “cute” woman and land a real hottie with some effort.

20 to 25: The world is yours to shape to your will. Men will follow you without question and women will throw themselves at your feet. Just be careful to use your power for good. And don’t give masculinity a bad rap by abusing or neglecting your wife. She’s a person too.

26: You are a candidate to be the alpha male of the world. Hmm… perhaps you should run for president?



First, determine what level of masculinity you wish to achieve. I don’t recommend settling for anything less than “Upper Beta.” You’ll have a hard time getting respect at any lower level. If you’re ambitious and enjoy improving yourself, you can try to cross into the “Alpha” zone.

I recommend starting out with what seems easiest to improve first. For example, maybe you’re a decent looking guy who could transform into a good-looking guy just by changing how you dress. Or maybe you’re fairly confident in yourself but just need to change up how you handle certain situations with your wife. These early successes will make you feel good and give you motivation to continue improving yourself.

After you grab the low-hanging fruit, try getting rid of your negative qualities. You may be able to turn a negative to a positive if you focus on improving it. That’s a big jump in improving your sexual value. Just doing the easy stuff and getting rid of your negatives might be enough to get you to the level you want.

Finally, realize that some attributes you cannot change or it’s simply not worth trying to change. Your height and age are what they are. And I don’t recommend joining a gang just to be “cool.” However, you can find creative solutions to even things like these. For example, if you get good at game, you might be able to reframe your wife’s preferences to think that short is sexy… or to prefer the “wisdom of old age” over the “vigor of youth”… or to see your lifestyle as cooler than anything shown on TV… etc.

For more tips on improving your sexual market value, follow my blog. I’ll be sharing the best tips and resources I learn on how to improve the various attributes suggested by this test.