In yesterday’s post, I wrote about the differing attitudes towards hypergamy. Attempting to suppress my own bias, I believe the different camps can be fairly represented as so:
- “Hypergamy is an expression of a woman’s sinful (or deviant) nature.”
- “Hypergamy is not bad per se, but it needs to be regulated.”
- “Hypergamy is what it is. Use it to your advantage. Survival of the fittest.”
- “Hypergamy should be respected. It’s purpose is to make the human race better.”
Originally, I would have considered myself in Camp #2. But upon further thinking, I’ve changed my mind.
Here’s my (rather roundabout) explanation:
If you believe (like most people) that life has some kind of meaning, you can think of life as a story. This applies both to your individual life as well the human race as a whole.
A story has 3 essential elements:
- A character
- A destination
- A conflict
The conflict is actually the most important part of the story. Without conflict you don’t have a story. Conflict creates emotion and meaning. Conflict makes the destination valuable.
The main character in life’s story is easy to identify. It is us. The human race.
The crucial questions are what is the destination? What is the conflict?
There are many philosophies about life and the story we’re living in, but, as far as I can tell, there are essentially only two possible narratives:
Type 1 Narrative: We must pursue an ideal of some kind. And it is our biology that hinders us from reaching that goal.
Type 2 Narrative: We must follow our biology. And it is evil (or an “unforgiving world”) that hinders us.
I know this is all abstract, so I’ll give a few examples:
Some bio-engineers and futurists want to create “super humans” (an ideal) and must transcend the limitations of our biology to do so. (Type 1 narrative.)
SJWs want to create “safe spaces” (an ideal) and must eliminate “toxic” masculinity (biology) to do so. (Type 1 narrative.)
A young man pursues a degree in engineering because he feels it’s the “responsible” thing to do (ideal), but his brain is not suited for the work (biology) so he struggles. (Type 1 narrative)
Augustine wanted to desire God more (an ideal) but his sexual impulses (biology) hinder him. (Type 1 narrative.)
A man wants to pass on his DNA (biology) and must survive in an unforgiving world long enough to procreate and ensure his offspring reaches maturity. (Type 2 narrative.)
A man wants to start a family (biology) but is killed by his envious brother before he can establish himself (evil). (Type 2 narrative.)
Type 1 narratives are especially common. But the problem with these stories is that they run against the grain of our natural design. So the destination is never achieved. They only serve to advance a perpetual cycle of guilt for “falling short.”
The problem with Type 2 narratives is that, without belief in a Good Creator, these narratives quickly devolve into a “survival of the fittest” mentality and justification for cruelty to the weak. It is a story, but it is a cruel and heartless one.
Biology is not the problem…
There is only one life narrative that can work to completion:
God created biology (life) as good, and evil is that which hinders our natural God-given instincts for life. We must overcome evil in order to fulfill what we were meant to do by our nature.
Biology includes not only the sexual instincts to seek fertility and reproduce, but also the instincts to enjoy good food, do creative work, protect and advance our dominion… anything that is “hardwired” into us that we do by instinct.
And yes, hypergamy is hardwired into women. It was placed there by a Good Creator. Therefore, it must not be despised, but rather respected and cultivated so it can fulfill its purpose.
I believe the natural purpose of hypergamy is obvious: it creates stronger men.
Our natural instincts are not the enemy. It is depraved thinking that is the problem… that which goes against nature.
And when a culture is established on depraved thinking, evil can appear to be “natural” because everyone is doing it.
But evil is against nature. And, more importantly, evil is devoid of love.
Because the ultimate conclusion of the Narrative is love.
Love is not an abstract ideal.
Love is when you not only seek your own (natural) interests, but those of others as well.
Love is when you encourage a man to develop his masculinity… instead of sleeping with his dissatisfied wife.
Love is when create value for others in exchange for money… instead of stealing.
Love is when you help someone find work they’re suited for… instead of pressuring them down a path not suited for them.
And love is when you become a better man in order to better fill the needs of a woman… instead of criticizing them for what they do by nature.
And, by nature, loving others is rewarding to us. It is the highest form of fulfillment we can reach in life.