I will feel like I’ve lived a life worth living if my writing can help men embrace the following two truths about life:
Truth #1: Women are easily deceived. A man should not trust a woman for advice.
Truth #2: A woman’s most powerful desire is to be bred and dominated by an alpha male.
Everything I write is really just theme and variation on those fundamental truths.
Coincidentally, you can approximate your rank (or potential rank) in the socio-sexual hierarchy based on how you responded to the above statements.
Alpha: **Shrugs and moves on.**
Beta: “Yes. I need to remember this.”
Delta: “I don’t know about that. I take advice from my wife all the time. She’s an intelligent woman. And a woman is not a sex object. You seem to be venturing into dangerous territory here.”
Gamma: “The socio-sexual hierarchy is based subjective judgments that have no scientific proof. I find it appalling that a blog that purports to give sex advice would force men into such arbitrary categories. Do you really think God would judge men by such standards? More likely, the author is simply trying to project an alpha persona to compensate for his insecurities. But he is clearly a poser who doesn’t know what he’s talking about. If he’s so alpha, why doesn’t he show a picture of his wife? Probably because she’s an ugly overweight cow. Ha! This guy is a joke.”
Omega: “Women are so stupid. Their suffering is well-deserved. Men are better off without them.”
Sigma: “Hmm… let me think about that…”
The following post will come as either a welcomed warning or obnoxious preaching, depending on your maturity.
Go to the ant, O sluggard,
Observe her ways and be wise,
Which, having no chief,
Officer or ruler,
Prepares her food in the summer
And gathers her provision in the harvest.
How long will you lie down, O sluggard?
When will you arise from your sleep?
“A little sleep, a little slumber,
A little folding of the hands to rest”—
Your poverty will come in like a vagabond
And your need like an armed man.
Blackdragon recently published an article called “The Two Life Paths” that perfectly illustrates this proverb.
“Path A” is analogous to the path of the sluggard. This is the life path most people take. It goes something like this:
- Childhood – No Agency
- Teens – No Agency
- 20’s – Screw Up Your Life
- 30’s – Repair the Damage
- 40’s – Max Income, Max Expenses
- 50’s – “Oh Shit, I Have No Money!”
- 60’s and beyond – Poverty
“Path B” is analogous to the ant or the diligent man:
- Childhood – No Agency
- Teens – No Agency
- 20’s – Work Hard
- 30’s – Live a Great Life
- 40’s – Live a Great Life
- 50’s – Live a Great Life
- 60’s and beyond – Live a Great Life
The key difference is what you do in your 20’s during the phase when you have “no chief, officer, or ruler.”
It seems that when most people reach their 30’s and 40’s they have too much ego investment in their life decisions. So they double down on their efforts and tell younger men that this is “just how life is.” They are unable, or unwilling, to acknowledge that life didn’t have to be that hard.
And, like the bitter middle-age spinsters who try to sabotage the life of young pretty women by poisoning their minds with feminism, so too do older men sabotage the lives of younger men by stubbornly denying essential truths about women and money.
As I write this, I am 28 years old. The biggest mistakes I’ve made in my life are:
- Getting into debt ($30K for college, $5K for badly executed entrepreneurship)
- Blowing my extra cash on business opportunities instead of securing a “Screw You” Fund
- Getting married before I established my career (women cannot emotionally handle the turbulence a man must go through to find and establish the right career)
- Wasting 5 and a half years of my life for a (mostly) worthless college degree
But I didn’t screw up my life too bad because I still managed to:
- Avoid alcoholism
- Avoid having children out of wedlock
- Marry the right woman (i.e. hot, smart, and, when I’m not being a pussy, sexually attracted to me)
- Avoid drugs
- Break my video game addiction
- Avoid getting a felony
- Pay my bills one way or another and avoid filing for bankruptcy
- Find the right career path (in spite of my wife’s anxiety about not pursuing a “normal” career, I’m very close to establishing an ideal lifestyle career)
So I’d say I’m on the retarded ant path. I’ve got some things to fix, but I’m on my way.
I think the ideal path for a typical young man would be this:
- 20’s – maximize your SMV, establish your career
- 30’s – marry a hot woman who’s significantly younger than you (high fertility, and age difference makes submission easier)
- 40’s and beyond – live the good life and teach other young men to do the same
The remedial path would look like this:
- 20’s – Start the wrong career, marry the wrong woman
- 30’s – Secure a “Screw You” fund, learn new skills, change career; implement Dread Game (concludes in either reviving the bedroom or divorce)
- 40’s – Marry a younger woman or enjoy the revived bedroom; Escape the Rat Race and invest your money like a wealthy person (see Rich Dad, Poor Dad)
- 50’s and beyond – Live off of your passive income, teach young men to avoid the same mistakes you made
The stages might be delayed by a decade depending on how quickly one recognized, accepted, and took responsibility for his problems.
Obviously, the remedial path is much more difficult than the path of the diligent young man and the reward is not as great. Hence the reason few people do it… and the reason most red pilled men prefer to spend their time complaining instead of fixing their lives.
Make of this what you will.
It’s harsh realities like this that make the Christian virtue of mercy shine all the brighter:
Neither women nor society care about male weakness. As alluded to in section 6, low tier men are invisible to women as a function of hypergamy.
If you are weak, depressed, small, poor, uneducated, unconfident, or anything else that prevents you from being powerful, nobody will care about whether you live or die.
People only care about you when you’re powerful, or a woman. You have to pull yourself up by the bootstraps and become self-reliant because nobody else gives a fuck. You’re given a dichotomy, sink or swim; you sink, and you end up drowning yourself in failure and self-pity. If you swim and only if you swim, people will start taking notice.
Society will always have a safety net for women, for weakness is a function of femininity rather than a bug. White knights will come to the rescue, the state will provide welfare and other women are more than happy to side with her – all of this in spite of any success or remarkable accolades! A man of equal unworth is condemned, and rightly so. Whilst women can cruise without social ostracisation, men cannot. Fair it is not, but true it is all the same.
-Illimitable Men’s Red Pill Constitution – Section 14
I know that, as a man, I will never forget those precious few times somebody took pity on my wretched state and lent a helping hand instead of passing judgment. It makes a difference.
A man would do well to ponder this chart if he wishes to have success in the bedroom:
(From the book, The ONE Thing by Gary Keller.)
Here’s a red pill interpretation:
Scenario: your wife isn’t having sex with you.
Here’s the path of accountability:
- Why doesn’t she want to have sex with me? (Seeks Reality)
- This is the way women are. (Acknowledges Reality)
- If I’m going to get laid, it’s up to me. (Owns It)
- What can I do? (Finds Solution)
- O.K. I’m going to try it and see how she responds. (Gets On With It)
Here’s the path of victimhood:
- Suffers in silence or complains without asking questions. (Avoids Reality)
- Rejects red pill truths or claims his case is different. (Fights Reality)
- “The Bible says a wife is supposed to submit to her husband! If she would quit being rebellious…” (Blames)
- “I can’t make her submit to me. That’s on her.” (Personal Excuses)
- “I’m turning it over to God. If He wants to change her heart, it’ll happen.” (Waits & Hopes)
Remember: a victim is sexually repulsive to women. But a man who takes charge of his life gets what he wants.
It’s an accepted truth in the manosphere that there is a trifecta of personality traits that result in immense personal power.
This “dark triad” gives a man access to high social status, power over men, and is the key to unlocking the legs of women. Basically, a Dark Triad man can get whatever he wants.
In case you’re not familiar with the traits, here’s a quick summary:
Narcissism – self-love and ridiculously high self-confidence. Low-self esteem people live their lives vicariously through high-self esteem people.
Machiavellianism – seeing life as a game of strategy that must be manuevered. People are seen as objects to be manipulated and used for their utilitarian value. Women love this (subconciously) because they have a craving to be the object of a man’s lust. And men without purpose want to feel useful and thus respond to a Machiavellian man.
Psychopathy – no sense of guilt or discomfort with making immoral choices. Psychopathic people do not feel guilt or fear about making ruthless decisions. This is advantageous to their quest for power, whereas more conscientious people have great difficulty doing anything manipulative.
(You can read a more in-depth summary at the Illimitable Men blog.)
At first glance, it would appear that Christian men are at a disadvantage. None of those attributes sound like appropriate behavior for a follower of Christ.
But it recently occurred to me that there is an equivalent to the Dark Triad for Christian men. Not only equivalant, but, I would content, superior to the Dark Triad.
The Kingdom Man’s “Dark Triad” consists of three attributes:
- Fear of the Lord
I will address each in turn below…
Trait #1: Diligence
The plans of the diligent lead surely to advantage, But everyone who is hasty comes surely to poverty. (Proverbs 21:5)
Diligence, when properly understood, has the same effect of irrational ego-based confidence.
Many Christians mistakenly believe that diligence is synonymous with hard work. While people often avoid diligence due to laziness, hard work is typically the result of a lack of diligence.
If you look up charuwts (diligence) in a Hebrew lexicon, you’ll see that it does not mean “hard work” or “effort.” It means “decision” with the image of making a deep and permanent cut. In other words, it’s a decision made after a careful analysis of the situation. It also involves taking self-initiated action on that decision (Prov 6:7-8).
The Bible teaches that being hurried is the opposite of diligence. Or, as Tim Ferriss puts it:
“Being busy is a form of laziness – lazy thinking and indiscriminate action.”
Probably the closest modern concept we have to diligence is the 80/20 principle. Approximately 20% of your inputs generate 80% of the output. 20% of your actions will result in 80% of your success. 20% of your habits are generating 80% of your problems. etc. etc.
The key is, don’t focus on working harder. Only two types of people believe working harder is the best solution: people who are insecure and people who are stupid.
Focus on making better decisions and then do those few things that will get you the best results.
Or focus on enduring the trials that will force the majority of your competition to drop out.
My wife sometimes accuses me of being arrogant. But I have a sincere belief that I am (or can be) better than the vast majority of men in whatever I choose to focus on.
But my confidence doesn’t come from a sense of being special. I simply understand that, at every level of competition, 80% of men are losers (relatively speaking.)
For example, if you accept the red pill and decide you want to have sex with a real woman rather than settle for porn and masturbation, that puts you in the top 20% of men.
If you actually manage to establish the (few essential) daily habits that will help you reach your red pill goals, that puts you in the top 4% of men.
If you study and practice advanced seduction techniques, that puts you in the top 1% of men.
And so on and so forth.
At every level of competition, you can count on these truths:
- 80% of your competitors will be too lazy (i.e. busy) to make a better decision
- 80% of your competitors will give up at the next roadblock
- 80% of your roadblocks are coming from 20% of the inputs
Once you truly grasp the power of diligence and the 80/20 Principle, you’ll have the same level of confidence of a narcissist.
Trait #2: Shrewdness
And his master praised the unrighteous manager because he had acted shrewdly; for the sons of this age are more shrewd in relation to their own kind than the sons of light. (Luke 16:8)
Christians are notoriously dim-witted when it comes to dealing with worldly affairs. This was the case even during Christ’s ministry.
A prime example of Christian naivity was during the advent of the movie as a new entertainment medium. Rather than seizing the opportunity and sending bright young men to film school, ministers wasted their efforts derailing against the evils of the medium and warning people to stay away. So instead, we’ve opted to allow God-hating secularists to seize the medium and use it to indoctrinate our children with feminism, socialism, and all kinds of other hellish ideologies.
And we still haven’t learned. Even to this day, pastors still haven’t figured out that what people read/watch/listen to on their phones informs their worldview more than what they hear from the pulpit. Preachers are boring. Social media is exciting. Attention is influence.
But it’s not just about seizing new communication mediums. It’s about building the kingdom and letting your light shine with the same level of shrewdness as one who is pursuing ungodly power.
Do you want to be great in the kingdom of God? Jesus says to build your house on the rock and shine your light for the world to see (Matthew 5:14-16.)
It’s always a battle. Either the world will overcome and subsume your house. Or your house will shine a light so bright that the world will be drawn to it.
It’s a shameful thing for a man to lose his dynasty. If a man is not vigilant, worldly people who are more shrewd than him will snatch away his children and spoil his work.
I recommend starting by reading and frequently pondering Robert Greene’s 48 Laws of Power. Apply that level of thinking towards leading your wife and building your house to be a beacon of light in the world.
Trait #3: Fear of the Lord
Do not fear those who kill the body but are unable to kill the soul; but rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell. (Matthew 10:28)
A man who fears rejection from God is immune to the social pressures of his day.
Imagine yourself standing before God’s throne on the judgment day…
“But… but… but God. I was following the traditional faith. I believed everything the catechism said. Everyone else was going that way. Surely, you’d understand…”
“Liar. You have twisted my plain words and willingly followed false teachers. This man is a worthless coward. Take him away and burn him. He is unfit for the kingdom.”
Remember that God is a fair judge. He doesn’t judge on a curve. You either bear good fruit or you don’t. And God says there is no room for cowards in the kingdom of Heaven. (Revelation 21:8)
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to test the limits of how much cowardice God’s mercy overlooks on the final judgment.
Don’t put your trust in religious slogans like “grace alone” or “my intentions are good.” Rather, you should be scared shitless about violating or adding to what God has plainly communicated in His word.
If you don’t understand a passage, beg God for wisdom and read the passage (in context) over and over until it makes sense.
When you find something in the Scripture that is contrary to what you believe or do, immediately change your mind about the matter.
And above all, show mercy to others so that God will be merciful to you (James 2:13)
Don’t rely on pastors.
Don’t rely on theologians.
Don’t rely on tradition.
You have the Holy Spirit who teaches you all things. (John 14:26)
When you truly understand the fear of the Lord, you will have no qualms about blatantly denying the unbiblical B.S. that passes off as church tradition. You won’t allow your conscience to be bound to extra-biblical teachings.
In other words, you will have the power of a psychopath.
Keep in mind that the majority of men have none of these traits. So if you can tap into the synergy of having all three traits, you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. Your house will be immune to storms and your light will shine forth before the world. And you will be called great in the kingdom of Heaven.
These are the kind of men that are needed to build a kingdom.
I thought this blog post I read over at Doing Marriage Right might be an encouragement to some of my readers.
Sadly, sex does not always get off to a good start in a marriage. As the author writes:
As I’ve stated before sex for us began with difficulty. Physical pain and inexperience, with a side of an inability to communicate like adults about sex, led to disappointment for both of us for many years. We have moved past that and sex is now regular and pleasurable. I have chronicled our success in the past.
Orgasm for my wife first came with vibrators, primarily the Hitachi Magic Wand, for many years. She found oral and manual stimulation painful. She said during intercourse, she felt nothing, and if it went too long (like more than a minute or two) it became painful.
But after I read his full story, I was reminded of two important truths:
- Bad sex today doesn’t mean it’s going to remain that way… even if it’s been going on for years
- Couples can still have great sex even after decades of marriage
Sexual problems are almost entirely psychological at the root. And the brain can be rewired over time with effective communication of the truth.
The belief in change is the first step towards healing.
Read the full story here:
Christian guys often worry about wanting sex too frequently.
“Am I normal?”
“How much is too much?”
“Am I being selfish by wanting so much sex?”
But if we’re going to take God’s word seriously, we’d have to conclude that God promotes the very “sex addiction” that Pastors and marriage counselors seem so quick to warn against.
Consider Proverbs 5:19… the penultimate passage on married sexuality:
As a loving hind and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; Be exhilarated always with her love.
Two key words here:
The word translated as “exhilarated” is shagah, which means to “go astray.”
Shagah is typically used in the context of being drunk or committing a sin out of ignorance. Picture a man who is so blind or intoxicated that he is not even aware of what he’s doing. He is veering off the path of reason into blind passion.
Now that’s interesting enough, but here’s the twist:
God doesn’t advise us to simply be shagah once in awhile… he wants us to be in this state of blind passion for our wife’s body always. The word translated “always” is tamid. It literally means “going on without interruption”, “of uninterrupted continuity.”
To put it another way:
The modern Christian marriage is the exact inverse of God’s design.
Most marriages are drudgery interrupted by occasional sexual passion.
But the proper marriage is continuous blind sexual passion occasionally interrupted by the necessary duties of life.
This is the only way I can make sense of the Apostle Paul’s commandment in 1 Corinthians 7:5:
Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.*
Apparently, the Apostle Paul expected a healthy marriage to be so sexually charged that they wouldn’t have much time to pray.
But there may come a time when it would make sense to stop engaging in perpetual foreplay. Perhaps you’ll need a few days to focus on prayer and studying Scripture without being distracted by a constant bulge in your pants.
But this is only if both husband and wife agree. And it should only be for a short while.
This also explains why both Paul and Jesus encouraged celibacy for those who were able. A married men is too busy messing around with his wife to have time for any outside enterprise for God’s Kingdom.
Marriage is designed to give normal men and women what they want most.
What do men want? To have a lot of sex.
What do women want? To feel sexy and get attention.
The Proverbs 5:19 lifestyle satisfies both needs.
It’s almost as if God knew what he doing.
* “Self-control” in 1 Cor 7:5 is sometimes translated as “incontinence.” It wouldn’t necessarily have the negative association we might read into it. It can simply mean that one has sexual appetites he cannot refrain from… which is part of God’s good design. Paul refers to singleness and marriage as different gifts, with singleness being preferable if one is so inclined.
A man can approach a marriage in one of two ways.
One way is to follow the path of the “Simple Man” as sung by Lynard Skynard:
Be a simple kind of man
Be something you love and understand
For me, being a simple man means three things:
- Having sex
- Raising kids
- Pursuing wisdom
I try not to concern myself with much else.
On the other hand…
You could follow the theme of what I would nominate to be the ultimate pussy-worshiping anthem:
I’ve found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
That sound you hear in the above video is the sweet serenade of a man who just lost his balls.
They’re both catchy songs. But only one will help you get laid.